Huh?

Another week and more stuff to deal with.  A lot of it unnecessary in my opinion but as I've learned over the course of this continuing odyssey, my opinions don't always count for much.

Our attorneys met and agreed on a date for a mandatory mediation meeting - early next year.  I'd been forewarned on this possibility, apparently Scarlett had not.  So item #1 (and like a lot of statistics I'm just making up the numbering as I go along) on my list of stuff was dealing with her sadness and madness over "making" her be at Tara over Christmas.  Though I knew it would do no good, I said that I can't "make her" do anything.  Well, if she had the money, RIGHT NOW, she could go out and secure another place is what I'm told.  True enough.  But, and again I've been down this road before, that requires delving into details that we do not have yet.  And of course that naturally leads to a rendition of the 50/50 chorus.

Item #2 was the subject of bifurcation.  My attorney informed me that Scarlett had told her attorney that she wanted to pursue this action.  I also discovered that I can not really object to it though my only reasons for doing so would be tax and insurance related.  Nevertheless, my attorney told the other side that we would not be objecting to this (since we can't anyway) but was his client (Scarlett) aware that once granted she would need to secure her own insurance and that in 2018 taxes would be filed as Single.  Well, said Scarlett's barrister, I've tried to explain that to her but I'm not sure she understands.  Okay then.  Moving on.....

Item #3 was then the subject of alimony aka "support".  We were also informed that Scarlett had instructed her attorney to pursue this order.  And again, my side is fine with that.  However.  Is your client aware (Scarlett) that once my client (Salty) begins making alimony payments that everything else (not entirely true but close enough) he has been paying will cease?  Excuse a moment while I copy and paste.....Well, said Scarlett's barrister, I've tried to explain that to her but I'm not sure she understands.

Anyone else detecting a pattern?

And that leads to item #4 - a long, confusing phone call from Scarlett to go over items 2 and 3.  As to bifurcation she stated her intent to pursue this and then told me that nothing would change.  Huh. 

Nothing?  You mean of course except that we would be divorced? 

Yes but nothing would change and you would still be paying for my health insurance.

And why would I be doing that?  A divorced couple cannot be on the same policy and therefore we would be required to get our own policies.

I can't afford insurance!  Are you going to fight me on this?

Not fighting you just explaining the facts.

And so she moved to item 3 - alimony.  Except, and this is only my theory, I believe her attorney has been referring to this as "support" which has confused Scarlett.

I just want to warn you that I've asked my attorney to get support for me.

So I'm aware.

Well, you know what that means?

Yes I do.  Do you?

Well, I don't have any income.  I can't work.  And I need money.

I'll put aside whether or not you can work for now.  Yes, alimony means that I would be sending you a check for some amount every month.  Do you know what else it means?

Huh?  What?

It also means that virtually everything else I'm paying for right now will stop.

Why?

What do you mean "why"?

Oh I see.  You're going to fight me on this too!

I'm not fighting.  But can I ask a question?

Go ahead.

Why are you so fucking dense?

And click went the phone.

Not surprisingly, Scarlett has decided to not pursue bifurcation this year though I have no clue about the alimony issue at this point.

So, moving on.....

Had a storm of texts from her yesterday (I hate texting btw) that started off fairly normal and innocuous but as usual in virtually any form of dialogue with her, eventually went downhill.

I'd picked up Salty Dog the night before because she was having some back issues and wasn't sure she could take care of him.  While there I performed a few tasks for her.  So now she wants to know why I keep doing things for her.

Because I'm a nice guy.

No.  There has to be more to it than that.  I think you're not sure you want this divorce.  You don't want to cut me loose.  You feel guilty.  That's why you're always doing things for me.

Uh, no.  The guilt thing is pretty much gone.  Dead and buried.  Now, I do have compassion and concern but really that's as far as it goes.

Well....I should've seen this coming but it'd been awhile.  I was then treated to numerous texts about her being old.  Broken.  Alone.  Lonely.  That's how the rest of her life will be.  I tried being philosophical with her by saying that just as you shouldn't go to the store while hungry, neither should you try and divine your future while in pain.

That was met with a "huh"?

This continued on for another 15- 20 minutes until I just had to stop it.

Surprisingly I wasn't bothered the remainder of the day.

And then there was the meeting with Dr. Shah.  But that is a post for later.