Word on the street has it that Scarlett is lining up potential suitors as well as investigating a move to the locale she just returned from. I've seen both these movies but I'm always up for a different ending.
Truth be told, as I remove my hat of sarcasm, my biggest and dearest wish for her is to find happiness. Not the elusive kind that comes and goes with the latest purchase, the latest meal, the current fun, but the lasting variety. The type you wake up with everyday. The one that makes it a pleasure to get out of bed and meet the day head on. Genuinely smile at those you meet, cease dwelling on the nagging doubts in your own head and enjoy your life.
I've known Scarlett for a few decades now and realized after not too many of those years that she can fake it pretty good. But not for very long. Spent an inordinate amount of my time (and therefore life) trying, in one way or another, to help her achieve that. She would dispute that some days but I believe deep down she knows I truly had her best interests at heart. Still do, which some days surprises me given what I've had to deal with during this ordeal.
The good doctor, the one with my Kona coffee, labels this as self defeating/self sabotaging/masochistic behavior. His theory/opinion is that her dysfunction, seeming helplessness et.al. fulfills a need in me. He has likened it to my putting on a Superman cape and riding to the rescue.
I can't say that I disagree and I am cognizant of his first and foremost duty to assist me in coming to terms with the various dynamics inside of me but, that said, I think the head shrink profession is at times too focused on the individual and fails to see the forest for the trees. As a good friend is fond of saying (and I'm stealing this forevermore) sometimes you have to step away from the campfire to see the whole picture.
What I mean here is that the act of helping someone in need does not necessarily mean that you yourself suffer from some sort mental malady yourself. Engaging in an act of kindness, practicing self sacrifice, helping those less fortunate, is not, in my opinion some character flaw. Can it be taken to an extreme? Certainly. Should you first look out for yourself and then others? As a general rule I would say yes.
But where do you draw the line? Hard to say I think. And, I imagine that line is going to be placed in different positions by different people depending on not only their own particular circumstances but also those of whom they are trying to help.
Have I taken my help to Scarlett to an extreme? Many if not most have told me YES. To a large extent I agree. Does that now mean I cut her off entirely? Make her go cold turkey as it were? Uh, no. It does mean I need to start tapering off and I have. And that has not been the easiest thing to do.
I think I need to retire to the Fortress of Solitude and contemplate with Jor-El.
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